Not worth mentioning celebrity "news"

Justin wants Victoria, but not like you may think. I don't understand the motivation behind this one...if he has a boyhood crush on Posh, I think he is going to have a hard time competing with David.

Derek Jeter joins the long list of athletes, actors, actresses, models, socialites, Wal-Mart store managers, Baskin Robbins Counter help....and gets his own fragrance from Avon.

Fantasia who? Is this movie really necessary? I know plenty of down on their luck young women who have changed their life or are in the process of changing their life who have about 1,000 times the talent that Fantasia has in their left pinky alone.

This isn't celebrity news, but it is the reason I have BDD and will never feel good enough about myself. Thanks hot guy named Brian for punching my self esteem in the face, but you could totally make it up to me by going out with me...thanks.

Dina Lohan better watch what she says about the millionaire head of the studio that is producing her gravy train's movie. He is old, rich, doesn't care, and pretty much has the support of the entire country, including Matt Lauer, for doing a job that should be Dina's (yes Dina...it is called parenting you loon...they make manuals for it now..even for dummies or the single gal such as yourself, and amazon lets you read some of it too, AND I linked it for you...just one click away from becoming a good mother). I think good ole Linds "could take" more if she weren't out boozing it up and whoring around every night of the week...but that is just an opinion.

Ken Paves again?

I swear, how could anyone that looks like him know anything about "style" and why would anyone want to hire him? Are there NO cute gay male stylists in Hollywood? His cheeks are sunken in, he is not dressing age appropriate, he is carrying around Jessy's LV purse like it is his, and PS the pouty look doesn't really work on his face...if he is trying to teach her how to perfect the look he should be doing it in his home behind closed doors and when she is actually looking at him. Click for a larger view.

That is one big bag

Okay, I will be the first one to admit that I have an obsession with handbags. I love them. I like looking at them when I go shopping. I like to imagine buying them for my girlfriends, my mom, my coworkers. I like them big and small, but I have to say this bag is ridiculous.
The only reason anyone would need a bag that big is because they are traveling somewhere (and it will clearly need to be checked) or they are carrying a dead body to the nearest body of water to be disposed of. I wonder if Mary-Kate is stashed in there?[source]

All-Bald-Up Recommends....

Hotel Icon in downtown Houston. That is the hotel that Brandon and I stayed at this weekend for the Kelly Clarkson concert. Why do I recommend them you ask? Well, I will tell you right now. The staff is extremely courteous and professional, and it isn't a fake courtesy...it seems completely genuine. While staying there, I had an incident of sorts with the iron resulting in a rust stained white Polo Shirt. I brought it to the attention of the manager and he promptly corrected the situation for me. I was extremely impressed with his professionalism to set things right. So, KUDOS to Matt (who was also very cute) at Hotel Icon for a job well done. I highly recommend them as a hotel. The 5 star status is reflected in the price, but the ammenities are wonderful!

Missed Connection

I mean...why do people have to be so lurid and lascivious? Don't get me wrong, I like to get a little lurid myself from time to time, but damnit have some class about it. Classy lascviviousness...does that exist. I ran across this missed connection on craigslist and about fell out of my chair.

"Looking to meet up with the guy that was standing next to me at the urinal in Oilcan's Friday night. You are about 6'5" or 6'6", dark hair, glasses, checking out the action on your left and right. I was on your right. Wanted to grab what you were showing, but got shy when it looked like your friend came into check on you. Want to try again?"

First of all...Jason is that you? Second of all who does this? Don't answer that...just think about it. Third, why would you want to grab someone's penis while urine is pouring out of it...that is nasty. My favorite part is when he says..."checking out the action". I don't know why that is fo funny to me, but it is.

Addicted Tour

Brandon and I went to see Kelly Clarkson in The Woodlands on Saturday night and it was SUCH A GOOD SHOW!!!! Girl knows how to get it on. She played some new stuff at the concert, which isn't news because she has said this in interviews, but I must say that I am SUPER excited about her third and very highly anticipated (at least for me) third release. We were of course surrounded by a bunch of teenage girls on the fifth row center section. I WAS IN ABSOLUTE HEAVEN! I sang along with every song I knew, and the little girls around me wondered how I knew the words to "Go", which is a song she did for Ford. Um...one word...Youtube, look into it. Here are some pics from the evening.

You can see all the pics by following this link. This is a kodak gallery and you will have to sign in or register if you are not a member.

Rooney opened for her, and they were actually pretty good.

This was the opening of the concert...SO cool. People were screaming like crazy.

During the concert she disappeared and reappeared at the back of the stadium, so of course we turned around, but I was in NO WAY prepared to see the LARGEST MULLET IN THE WORLD. But Kudos to the mullet mom for bringing her kids to see Kelly and getting tickets so close. Lover her for that, hate her for the hair. WOW that is a big mullet.

She came within four seats of me. OH. MY. GOD. I almost lost my shit and considered knocking down four 12 year old girls down to get up close to her. This picture is when she was two rows back.

The end of the show and Kelly thanking the crew and crowd.

Was I right about Reichen?

So this lovely article showed up in PageSix today:

July 31, 2006 -- DON'T expect Lance Bass and his lover Reichen Lehmkuhl to be together much longer. Friends of Bass say he's sick of Lehmkuhl's controlling ways. "Reichen forced Lance to come out just at the same time he has a book coming out ['Here's What We'll Say'] so he could ride the publicity wave," said our spy. "He is a big gay activist and very controlling. He wants Lance to give up his straight friends and do whatever he tells him to." Lehmkuhl has taken every opportunity to go on-air. He told "The Insider," "I'm happy it's shocking people . . . I couldn't be more proud of Lance. It's definitely a sense of relief. There are a lot more smiles. We are so happy about it." A rep for Bass skirted the issue and said: "Lance couldn't be happier with the overwhelming reaction he's getting from all over the world."

I can't imagine that Reichen would try to use something like Lance's coming out to shamelessly help himself sell more books or promote himself...HAHAHAHA, yeah right. If this report is true Lance better seriously take a step back and reassess the entire situation, because nobody should have to give up their friends regardless of them being gay or straight, just like nobody likes to get beat either...er...I mean walk into doors. Like I said, he is a media/fame whore and this just proves my point, and besides, who in the hell is going to buy his boring ass book anyway. Unless there is something lurid and tawdry in that book, I think I will re-read The Adventures of Huck Finn. Thank youuuuu. Of course, now that I have had time to think about it, I bet Reichen probably planted this story to get himself more publicity.

OH. MY. GOD.

So...yeah...Miss Independent puts on one damn good show. I am going to upload the photos from the concert later today to share them with all of you. LOVE HER!

Lindsay, consider yourself served

It is about time someone let Lindsay have it for acting like a rotten skank. James Robinson, who heads the production company currently producing Lohan's current flick with Felicity Huffman and Jane Fonda called "Georgia Rule" has had it with LiLo's antics and behavior and he has let her have it. Some of the highlights include:

"We are all aware of your that your ongoing heavy partying is the real reason for your exhaustion."

"...you will be held accountable."

Thank GOD for the Smoking Gun! Have a gander at the entire letter at this link. I LOVE ICK!

Addicted

I will try to make some posts tomorrow (Friday) but I may not have internet access, and I will also be in meetings most of the day that will keep me from using a computer, but I WILL try. In case I don't, I wanted to let you know that I am so excited I could spit! Brandon and I will be going to see my all time fave Kelly Clarkson in Houston on Saturday night. We will then be hitting the town for some debauchery and scandalous behavior. Pictures will be posted on Monday. MUAH!

I don't wanna be here if you're gonna be there

Afternoon delight

Fabian Hauquier

I am having a semi-shitty day at work and I am going to completely complain about it right here and right now...along with several other things that annoy me at this very second.

10. Shutting down your perfectly working computer when you leave work on Friday, only to restart it on Monday and three main programs you use don't work upon start up.
9. Calling Dell Tech Support to fix factory installed Microsoft Outlook 2003 after it has failed to launch (losing all previous emails and contacts) only to be told that you need to call Microsoft, who then tell you to call Dell (and will offer to transfer) because "you are running Dell's version of MS Office", but only after you have been on hold for an hour and have tried to trouble shoot it with "hardware" tech support for three hours. Really...I thought they were all the same...thanks for nothing you multibillion dollar companies.
8. Being told by tech support that you are going to have to call the software hotline, but there will be a charge for it. (UM...what?)
7. An ugly girl who latches onto homos, because she will never find a man because she is always hanging out with the gays at the gay bars, but then gets an attitude because she is being ignored because none of the homos think she is hot enough to pay 2 seconds worth of attention to her while at least one other girl in the room is.
6. People who call my office to request a 911 address for their property and have no idea where it is, who they purchased it from, who pays the taxes, or what it looks like. "It is down the road from there and you take a left at the oak tree, and then we have a gate with a gravel entrance and a culvert". Thank you for those descriptive directions, but you just described over half the properties in the county.
5. Vanessa Minillo...don't even get me started.
4. The fact that it is now Thursday and my Outlook STILL doesn't work! GRRRR.
3. Getting a letter from my Nelnet (the student loan people) who have purchased my second seperate loan from LoanStar, are now sending me TWO seperate bills, and when I call to ask them to combine the two accounts (because they are both the same type of loans) Noyataria tells me that they cannot consolidate the loans because the combined sum of my loans is less than $7500. Um...what? That is dumb, and very wasteful of paper.
2. Days of Our Lives taking 3 weeks to finally reveal what it is that Sami has done this time to ONCE AGAIN sabotage her sister Carrie's life with Austin, only to be consoled by a super hot british accented man named EJ, because he either secretly wants Sami or he is working with Kate to bring Sami down.
1. Crystal Meth users.

Lindsay Lohan for American Apparel?

I ran into these pictures of LaLohan about to step out for Jeremy Piven's birthday bash (or something) and the first thing I thought was that she was shooting amateur photos to be featured on American Apparel's website. Either that or she has become involved in some ill-conceived pornography ring. Seriously, these pics look like something the police would find in some sex offender's lock box during an episode of Cold Case.

Can I just say that choosing a bathing suit color that blends in with your skin is not an easy thing to wear, and Lindsay does not succeed. This picture just screams...well I am not quite sure what it screams, but it is hurting my ears and my eyes.

The only explanation that I can think of as to why these photos were snapped is because she did exactly what me and my friends do before we go out, she tried on two different swimsuits to see which one would make her look the cutest in any photos that might be taken. She eventually chose this doiley looking number. Maybe after she gets done uploading her amateur pics to American Apparel's website, she could take a gander at some of their cute swimsuits.

Tara Reid needs support

And I mean that literally. It is a shame that some that used to be pretty rockin' now has the body of a middle aged woman who has popped out five kids, two of which given her grandkids before they turned 20 (slutty kids). Clearly she has no true friends, because a true friend would never let someone walk out of the house or hotel room looking a busted up hot mess such as this.

And what the hell is wrong with her stomach? It looks like a melting candle, and I doubt it smells like vanilla. BARF! I have two words for her...one piece. Or should that be one word? Who the hell knows?

and I float....

Here are the pictures from the Comal River Float last weekend. A great time was had by all. There is even a little video at the end for all you "Wicked" fans...courtesy of Corey. The image quality is not so good because it was a 35mm disposable camera that clearly sucked.

Matt begins the day with his ritual flip the camera and everyone else off pose.

Here we are all bottle necked up while people on the wall watch.

Here I am in my gay lil' swimsuit after four maragaritas...clearly not wanting my picture taken.

Corey matched the wallpaper perfectly.

Kelly and Michael funnin' on the couch.

Matt, Me, Curt, and Brian

Brandon and Matt

And he's OUT!

So, like all speculated and suspected, Lance Bass has come out of the closet. He has admitted to People magazine that he is gay and dating fame whore Reichen, which I am sure is a completely stable relationship. Good for you Joe! Congrats and yada yada yada. He will be making the cover of People next week. I am guessing that the pitch his boyfriend made for a reality show, also co-starring him, about Lance's revelation did not fly with tv execs and the next step was People. I am sure they paid a nice price for it. That is beside the point, because I should give him props for coming out of the closet. Now everyone can stop talking about him behind his back, although I feel an ET exclusive coming on with questioning coming from the GAWD awful Vanessa M. Why hasn't Mary Hart done something about her yet? This might be a good time to introduce a new segment called "Hart to Heart" hosted by Mary Hart. BARF. Is it just me that is shocked that his bf did not jump onto the cover too, and he could have taken a better picture. [Source:Queerty]

Postings will resume

Hey kids, work has been strangely busy the last couple of days and will probably be that way for the next couple of days. Postings will resume in a couple of days. Thanks for the patience.

So how single are you?

This past weekend I went floating down the Comal River with some friends and had a fantastic time. There was a girl along with us who I got to talking with after she said she wanted to discuss something with me. She asked me the question, "so are you single". My answer was, "yes, I am single". She replied, "so what exactly do you mean by 'single'?". I said, "well, I am not seeing anyone, I am not sleeping with anyone, and when I masturbate...it's just me, myself, and I". "Okay, so we have the same definition." Her next question followed was, the inevitable "why?". I don't know how many reasons she wanted, but after some quick personal reflection I basically told her that I am really not boyfriend material because, 1. I have been scorned many times leaving me cynical and bitter with nothing more than a cold hard heart fueled by ice in my veins, 2. I am a 'mess', I admit it and guys have told me this but that is me, 3. I find it hard to take myself seriously much less expect another person to, I have no idea if this is a defense mechanism or what, and 4. I have come to the realization that "the one" does not exist in gayworld. Wow, does that make me sound bad? Okay, so I don't really have ice running through my veins, but I am a "mess", and actually I think I take myself too seriously. Oh and I have a touch of body dysmorphic disorder.

Know thy audience

Okay, Myspace really has no excuse to thrust images like this at me when I need to sign-in to look at a profile or when I log out. Because clearly I am not the correct audience for this...am I right ladies?


And call me crazy insane, but I think I am more likely to find a hooker who works on an hourly rate or Russian mail order bride than I am to find true love. Settle it.

Matt's Thursday Birthday

We celelbrated my friend Matt's birthday last Thursday night. Here are some pics from the night.

Mom jean a trend?

I just hate it when bad underwear happens to cute boys. I came across this picture on Connexion.org today and since he is not a verified member I thought I would make a little fun of the fact that he is wearing grandpa's boxer briefs.
Might I suggest shorter legs, a cotton/lycra blend, and either giving these back to grandpa or throwing them in the garbage. Cute boy though.

Worst Punk'd EVER

Okay, it is times like this when I am thoroughly disappointed that actors are not like their tv counterparts. Ellen Pompeo is not a nice person, and this just proves it. I mean...what is a little harmless flirting by a waitress (which is pretty damn tame if you axe me) in order to get a better tip, but to go so far as to say that she is going to jam a fork in her clavicle (did she learn that on Grey's or what?) and let her bleed all over the sidewalk causing her Vegas-esque foundation to run.



Then, to end it by getting pissed about the amount of the tip, knowing damn good and well that she is getting a raise for Season 3. I mean...really. I will never see Meredith in the same flourescent hospital light again. Lighten up you silly C-U-Next-Tuesday.

Tigers. By Britney Spears

Hey Ya'll here are he latest ramblings by Britney on her website:

"In some ways, people are a lot like animals," Spears writes. "I'm mesmerized by tigers. Their eyes, their stripes, their constant quest for survival. They almost have a sense of mysteriousness about them. They pull you in and make it difficult to look away. They make you wonder what is behind their gaze. A sense of eerie awe comes over you in their presence. The fear they give you when you pass them is stunning. Behold the beauty of the tiger."

UM...WHAT!?!? It would probably be best to keep something like that to yourself, as not to elude to the fact that you are teetering on the edge of some kind of brain malfunctioning disorder, and I am confused...does she own a tiger? Does K-Fed want a tiger to ride shotgun in his Ferrari? Or does she just not realize that her high-def tv isn't really a window? What does this all mean B Spears? All I have to say about tigers is: "THEY'RE GRRRRRREAT!", especially when covered in extra sugar and drenched in milk. HUH, WHAT? What do you mean tigers aren't part of a balanced breakfast?
[PageSix]

Maybe

I will blog later...maybe not.

My horoscope according to Friendster

Sometimes, it is sort of weird how the horoscopes that Friendster churns out are pretty accurate. Case in point, my horoscope for today:

This whole Lone Ranger act must stop -- it's time to integrate yourself back into the lives of the people around you. The ideal opportunity to do this is coming into your life right now, so take advantage of it. Ask for help, ideas and opinions from the people you've distanced yourself from. Showing them that you value what they have to say will solidify your relationships and encourage the forces around you to help you get back on track. You'll be headed in the right direction before you know it.

I have been acting all Lone Ranger for a couple of months now...weird.

Oh Joe

Simpson that is. You know, I don't know what else I can say about Joe Simpson...Jessy and Ash's pimp daddy. It is stories like these that make him seem more crazy and creepy as these hot summer days are long. From WWTD, a story alleging that Joe has been spying on his daughter's ex-husband from the time they seperated until their divorce was finalized. One incident occurred last spring after Lachey was at a nightclub with future girlfriend Vanessa Minillo and Jessica's ex-assistant CaCee Cobb. The New York Daily News says:

"Joe called the club people after hearing Nick was there and demanded to see the security videotape. The club declined to cooperate. According to the source: "Joe was looking to incriminate Nick. He told the club, 'If you ever want to see my daughter there, you'll give me what I want.'"

Um...what? What exactly is he going to incriminate Nick for? Overage drinking? Canoodling with that styrofoam-esque Vanessa Minillo? How about getting intimate secrets about Jessy from CaCee Cobb? I am sure some of those are worth some change. You know, like the one time when she was walking down the hall in high school and the back of her skirt was totally tucked into her underwear...like...OMG...she was SO embarassed...or what about that time she got drunk at Mack's party and she barfed in the pool. UGH. And really, what kind of empty threat is telling a club owner that she will never set foot inside their club? Who the hell cares if she comes or not. I doubt that her appearance will make or break the place. I think stories like this on MSNBC about him spreading rumors about Lindsay Lohan because she used her right to bar Jessy from a party also relfect an image of an immature junior high girl. I also add that it is pictures like this one of him checking out his daughter's non existant cleavage that make him kind of creepy too.

Sweet Dreams

Thanks to Trent for introducing us to David!

Okay, all I have to say about this guy is...WOW. See, this is the guy that is way too pretty to date, not that a guy that looks like this would be interested in someone that looks like me. And not that I would ever get the chance to win him over with my fantastically witty personality, because I look like me, but this pretty dish is the kind that would make a straight man salivate.

We're Fabulous...that isn't news

So, Hilton has jumped on the band wagon and decided to target the gays with its advertising. I am less than impressed what their ad agency, Yes Design Group, came up with:

I wish I knew the first faggot who used the word "fabulous", made it synonymous with being a homo, and spread it like wildfire, because I would crack his damn teeth for saying it. The word is tired and needs to be retired to a place from which it will never return. I have, personally, never used this word, except to mock the way Oprah says it. I never refer to anything as fabulous. I did steal a word from Heidi Klum in Season 4 Episode 2 of Sex and the City..."fantastic". That bag is fantastic. That outfit is fantastic. It is subtle and describes what you are talking about perfectly. Spread that one like wildfire. And also, where is the "cutting edge" part of that ad. Gay marketing has disappointed me...yet again.
[Source:Queerty]

Skin and bones

I think Carson Daly has caught Nicole Richie's eating disorder. Whoever said you can never be too thin or too rich was wrong. There is such a thing as too thin!


Eat something!

Protesting Scruf

Can someone please hire these girls to do something...I mean...really. Is Burger King hiring...oh wait, Brooke already works for them. Do they have nothing else to do? I mean, there is nothing and then there is NOTHING. I think joining NOSCRUF.ORG (National Organization of Social Crusaders Repulsed by Unshaven Faces) is even less than nothing. When I saw this I thought, "Surely this is a joke of some kind and CANNOT be real", but no.

source:[justjared]

I am, at times, against a man having facial hair and at other times I am not, but to protest it? I am REAL sure that Brooke is going to go around with unshaved legs considering she makes her living doing this:

I dunno, maybe some guys are into hairy sasquatch legs and seeing Buckwheat tucked underneath both arms. As far as Kelly Monaco goes...I always wondered what happened to her after Dancing With the Stars. Now I know, she has devoted her life and time to a cause even more worthy than helping starving children in Somolia or rebuilding New Orleans. Bravo Kelly, you have made a wise choice, and I applaud you for improving the appearance of men everywhere. Although, something inside makes me wonder if she is REALLY this passionate about this cause or if she is doing it to be "seen". I guess we will never really know. Will the next stop be Oprah? Only time will tell.

Big Brother Casualty #1

And bounce your ass out Alison. I have gotten sucked into watching Big Brother: All Stars and it was full on drama from the get go. For being "All Stars" these two sure did screw themselves really fast. Danielle and Allison immediately teamed up to try to get people out of the house. First of all, don't mess with Janelle. She is a bad ass bitch and I think she could take Alison in one swipe. In the end, they put this plan into action to get BB6 members out of the house, and it immediately backfired on them. Poor Eve. All I have to say is that Alison pissed me off from the get go because she had nothing good to say about Janelle and America loves J.

DOH!

Okay, you know, it is always nice (as an admitted sinner) to know that there are other people that will be going to hell a long time before I do. Case in point...the creator of this line of dolls known as the "Downsyndrome Dolls". Betcha won't see Marie Osmond hocking these on QVC.


Number 1, I don't know anyone that wants a retarded baby, and secondly...who would want a retarded doll? Yes, this is Tomas, my Cabbage Patch Kid, Lucinda Kendall's retarded sibling. NO! This is the end all for seeing all this week. Thanks!

And just so YOU will know,

and your children will know. This is one of the best scripted and acted burns ever shown on primetime televsion:

Out of the Blue

Is this trick or true? Oh Debbie, I thought it was only in my dreams, but have you gone from believing anything is possible to playing a foolish beat on a karaoke microphone? I can read between the lines that your electric youth has gone and your fallen angel status has required you to play the field and I begin losin myself in your dreamy red hot over the wall tunes. Shades of the past make me think we could be together again, because you should've been the one. So many fans used to be helplessly in love with you, but now I know there is no chance of us staying together. How lame am I? I hope she is making some good money on this thing, because it is muy $$$$. I just wish she would stop pointing at me, taunting me, longingly gazing into my soul, knowing me better than...uh...uhm..what just happened? I blacked out for a moment.

Reichen/Lance Bass Saga Allegedly Continues

Okay, I just have one thing to say about reality stars. You are not a star once your show ends. You have your moment and then...POOF...you should ride off into the sunset and go back to your regular life, because the majority of you people have less than no talent and the desperate attempts to hold onto some sort of "career" aren't cute. Case in point, Reichen from The Amazing Race. It is not that big of a secret, from what most people in Hollywood say, that he and Lance Bass are dating. Then I get wind of this "news" from Janet Charlton's website:

"The two dudes go out of their way NOT to be photographed together - especially during their Provincetown vacation. We hear they actually have a good REASON for wanting to keep their male romance under cover - according to an insider, this power couple is shopping around a reality series about their lives - and the big selling point is Lance finally coming out of the closet! So whatever you do, don't spoil the surprise!"

Yes, by all means, please keep the cat in the bag, because that would be a tragedy if everyone were to find out. I took a survey and three out of three office workers don't care and would not watch this on tv, because frankly...this couple sounds boring. I doubt they would be as entertaining as Kathy G. or Being Bobby Brown. I guess the Big R realizes his Hollywood hopes of being a real actor will never come to pass, and has decided to stick to what pays the bills: reality tv, but to make a publicity stunt out of Lance's coming out? This just makes me wonder even more if he is just using Lance for his personal gain. The whole "coming out" process is not an easy one, and if Lance is gay, then I think everyone he wants to know already knows, which makes me realize that the whole "coming out" on reality tv would be SO completely staged I would gag. Also, while Reich is an attractive man, facially speaking, I have my doubts about how great his body really is. It kind of looks old mannish and saggy around the stomach area if you ask me. I am sure the both of them are lovely people, but I am kind of sick of hearing about them.

Endnote: If I were to be on a reality show, I would probably do the same thing that most of them do as the 15 minutes of fame begins to end. Hold on for dear life and try to feed life into it, because I think once the "bug" bites you, you never really are cured of it.

What is worse?

I am currently looking for new employment. I have hit the ceiling on my salary at my current job, and I have also hit the ceiling on what I can learn. I am currently the 911 Database Coordinator for Lee County. I have a BBA in MIS, but the majority of my experience is with GIS, and I am looking to transition my talents and expertise into a more creative field. I HATE looking for a new job. I think it is one of the most time consuming and exhausting things a person can do. That can be especially true if a person has no idea what he/she truly wants to do. Sorry for not posting anything yesterday, but I am not in the sassy posting mood.

1,000 Views

My blog hit 1,000 views today thanks to someone whose ISP is based in Seguin, TX, and I think I can thank Jason B the Chicken Farmer for the hit. Thanks J!

Don't leave home without it!

And by "it", I mean her face. I have to insist that Eva Longoria NEVER leave her house without her makeup on. I mean...she looks like a busted up mother from the valley who is worn out from a day of discount shopping with her 6 hellacious kids who have just torn up a Wal-Mart toy department. Is she trying to scare me and the rest of the world? And I am not ashamed to admit that at the same time, this makes me wonder how fabulous I would look with a little MAC applied to my face in the morning.
This takes me back to my junior high days and the first time I spent the night at one of my friend's house who I thought had the prettiest mom...until I saw her in the morning with no makeup on. It looked like someone had risen the dead, and I never spent the night there again.

Stylishly salt your food

Although I can think of about a million other ways to spend $345, but for the gal who has it all and doesn't want to seem insensitive towards the cook. [iLuren]

American Idols Sell Souls to Ford Motor Co.

Oh. My. God. I mean...really? How much money is Ford paying these people, because I hope it is a lot. When you get to the point where your music video is nothing but product placement for the Ford Mustang...is that a sign that something is wrong. Of course, I could be on the wrong path here, because this particular song could have been recorded specifically for Ford Motor Company Promotions...at least I hope so. The song is catchy though...we'll see if it shows up on her new album. Check out the video starring: Ford Mustang. Kelly does look hot with the dark brown/black hair. I just wish she would lose that damn nose stud.



And then you have this one? I am sorry, but this is the most spastic looking commercial I have ever seen, and Taylor Hicks is not so much. I mean...this would not make me want to run out and buy a Ford Product, more out of fear that his bizarro ass is gonna be jumping around the showroom screaming this jingle. And the commercial isn't even done well enough to be able to tell that he isn't lip syncing. Possiblities my ass...that rocks.



And complete offense to him, because I think AI is gonna lose a lot of money on this one. Just a feeling, but a feeling that feels very right. I guess it is a blessing to him, maybe Ford can hire him as a salesman when his career doesn't take off.

I really do!

Okay, this is the actual wedding of my friend Andrea that I attended this past weekend.

The flower girl was gorgeous. She is Andrea's daughter.

It was a short, simple, and sweet ceremony. It was outside, and it was SO hot and humid out.

Someone actually wrapped a present like this. They just took the damn roll and wrapped it around the major part of the box and left the rest exposed. Last minute gift? I think so. Come on people, have some class...finish wrapping the box. Granted she will probably already know despite the wrapping, but still. Let the reception begin!

This is me and Laura, a girl I knew in high school, but didn't become friends with until recently. Fun gal, likes to drink, and is a hoot! Yes, I said "hoot".

I don't like how drinking makes you "think". Emotions are heightened and you think about things that will never happen. Good times!
No reason I can't pretend with someone who is already married, whose husband went to get another drink. And that's all folks. I ended up in downtown Austin, sweating like "Whitney going through customs" because my clothing was not hot and humid friendly. Oh well. It was fun. Congratulations Andrea!