All Bald Up With No Place To Go

Making NO apologies for stating what is obvious to me, but may be oblivious to others.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Diane Keaton is classy with a "K"

I love this. Although, I would consider Diane Sawyer's reaction to be extremely lame. I can only imagine Robin Roberts' head exploding if she were the one giving the interview.

Monday, January 07, 2008

Sickly in Seattle

So, I went to Seattle for New Year's this year to see my friend Greg. On my trip out there, I had the pleasure of sitting next to a man that had the sick. He was caughing, and snotty, and just gross all over. Fifteen minutes to land he decided he wanted to know where I was from and I told him. That started a conversation...a conversation that I regret ever having. Upon my return to Texas, I started feeling bad and it developed into some sort of flulike something or other. I was in misery for two days and thought putting a bullet in my brain would surely be less painful than the sick. I am much better now, but it seems I have infected others. Greg is now sick, and my friend Amy has also come down with it, and I do believe a couple other people in my office are coming down with it. That will teach me to talk to strangers on a plane.

You Do The Gay Math

Last night's Desperate Housewives was one of the best and funniest episodes I can recall seeing in quite a while, and it makes me very sad that there will not be any new episodes because of the writers' strike. The gay part of the storyline was particularly hilarious because it is SO true...you know...the "gay math" part. And even moreso when Bree tried to hook Andrew up with Walter. This scene is quite priceless. The reactions, the dialogue...perfection!

This scene with Gabriel is also quite a gem.

Sunday, January 06, 2008

Start The Car...START THE CAR!

I absolutely love this IKEA commercial...just the sound of the woman's voice alone sends me into fits of uncontrollable laughter.

Are You Going To Kill Yourself?

That is the question I have after reading this posting from Craigslist:

having tough times... really appreciate your friendliness in spite of my inappropriatness. you are my favorite hair client.. i dont feel i will be around much longer, and i dont have the balls to tell you directly... so im putting it out in cyber-space..to the fates. i wanted you know what you meant to me.. and if where i am going has emotions.. you will be missed ... thank you brandon.. will miss you--- your hairstylist. CT

Is he serious? While, suicide is never funny, if you really want to go through with it, why would you broadcast it like that? Hopefully, if this is true, Brandon will see this and interfere. Good luck CT...whoever you are.

Nothing's Free Baby

So some chick from The Apprentice has decided to offer up her lawyer services to Britney Spears for free of charge. She says that she has a fool proof plan to get Britney back on the straight and narrow road of getting her children back. Her plan goes like this:

1. Stacy would move into Britney's house to help her get her life back in order. Yeah, Stacy...I am sure Britney will totally go for that. First of all, you are not a dude, and that is what Britney is into...dudes. You may have masculine features, but a dildo does not replace a dick.

2. Britney will have to "hibernate". No more Starbucks runs for Brit Brit, and she again mentions that if she has to move in and open up her own Netflix account so they can stay in and watch movies, she will do so. Um...again, that is ridiculous. Britney thrives on Starbucks, and the only way that lunatic is going to stay home is if you get a Starbucks built on her property with fake paps taking her picture as she walks back and forth from her house to the Starbucks next to the pool, because we all know she is just as addicted to having her picture taken as she is to meth (have you seen her fingers...ewww), and caffeine.

3. Britney needs to keep her mouth shut and get her emotions under control. You know Stacy, in order to do that, you are going to have to find the hidden meth lab in her house...which you could do while you move in with her and destroy it, because that is why Britney can't keep her mouth shut. Either that or she is bipolar, or just crazy.

4. She will have to practice her testimony, because now she is making herself seem crazy or that she doesn't care. BINGO!!!! Bitch isn't as stupid as I thought. Britney doesn't care you dumb slag, which makes this whole posting moot or "moo" because she couldn't care less about all of it.

Furthermore, does this look like the face of someone you would listen to? I know I would take one good look at her, throw up my best "talk to the hand" gesture, flip my hair (if I had any), and walk away. All this is, is some dumb chick trying to get some face time with the media because her 15 minutes of fame didn't even last that long after she was done with her involvement with The Apprentice. And also...what does she think she has that other people don't have when it comes to getting a handle on Britney's insane and debaucherous behavior? Unless she farts tranquilizing gas, she is never going to get a leash on Britney and you can forget the late night pillow fights, eating chocolate, giving each other facials, and screaming from watching Alien vs Predator while braiding each other's hair attempt to keep Britney at home on any day of the week that ends in "Y". Good luck with all that Stacy, because I am pretty sure there are people a bit more qualified to help good ole Brit Brit out, and you have just made a fool of yourself, but fortunately for her...and also the saddest for her is most people are like..."who the hell is Stacy Schneider". I know I am. [pagesix]