The Not So News

- Dina Lohan skanked up Kobe Club with a little hand up the hiked up skirt but tried to cover it with a napkin action. Dina and a unknown man were going at it in a booth, when he realized people knew what was going on when he heard a collective dry heave from the entire place. A rep for Dina said, "That's a disgusting lie and it's completely untrue." Yes...who knew someone could make "third base" seem SO disgusting? Why does Dina need a rep? Isn't she Lindz's rep? Second...bitch knows it is true, because she is skank. This is doing nothing to help her chances with Clooney. [pagesix]

- Federline tries to squeeze as much money out of Britney as he possibly can...decides selling her his share of the kids for $50 million will guarantee she gets custody. She originally offered $10 million as a settlement. Dumbass should have taken that mess and run. Who sells their kids? Nevermind, don't answer that! [L&S]

- That Kim Cardash girl says there is no sex tape of her, others say there is a sex tape of her and she is profiting from it through a third party. Personally, I don't care about this ho because I don't even know who in the hell she is, and I don't really care, but then I read the description of the video: "It's your typical graphic sex tape...there's a golden shower at the end". A golden shower? WTF? Who does that...who likes to get pissed on...you know...other than Ricky Martin? I CANNOT for the life of me imagine getting pissed or shat on. NASTY slag. [nydailynews]

- How would you hold your People's Choice Award? [o&u]