The Not So News

- $2 million for Eva Longoria's wedding photos? Really? $2 million? What about Eva Longoria and Tony Parker makes them worth $2 million for some color photos? OK! magazine, while not confirmed, has won the bidding war, and totally got raped. How much are they pre-selling the photos for shots of their divorce papers? Guess that hooker has to do something as she won't have much to do when Desperate Housewives finally gets cancelled. Although she could totally come work for her alleged uncle who is a plumber in my hometown. [entertainmentwise]

- Rosie O'Donnell will not be taking over hosting duties for Bob Barker as previously discussed. Apparently, they were unwilling to compromise on her keeping residency in NYC and making trips out to the West Coast for several tapings a day a few times a month. I wasn't really feeling Rosie as a good replacement for Bob, because while I love Rosie, I just don't see anyone having the ability to take over for Bob...EVER. [dlisted]

- The ever loathesome Cammy D has gotten into some hot water in Peru because of her fashion. The sandpaper faced actress was sporting a bag with a red star and chinese words on it that translated to: Serve The People, and was used during a time when the late Chinese Communist leader Mao Zedong, led an insurgency in the 1980s and early 1990s that left nearly 70,000 dead. She issued a publicist released apology and giggled all the while thinking..."DAMNIT my plan to bring back communism through fashion has been foiled!" She also praised Peruvians' beauty and warmth and said she hoped "for their continued healing." Because you know...nothing helps heal a wound like reslicing it open with the rusty serated knife her facialist uses to smooth out Cammy's lines. [people]

- Jessy and Kate's stylist lives in a pig stye. Jessica Paster held a "cattle style" casting call at her home this past weekend for a new assistant and everyone in attendance got a glimpse at what it is like to be the person that makes the likes of Jessy Simpson look so damn glamorous...disgusting. Apparently the floor of her house is full of expensive clothes from designers that her dog uses to sleep, eat, and take a piss on. I can only imagine as part of the interview process, and just so they know their place in her organization, the applicants had to follow the dog around, watch it piss or shit on couture, and then show their expertise in getting a dookie stain out of Armani. Luckily, she treated them to Nicole Richie's old diet of Lean Cuisine and Red Bull. Can you imagine working for such a person? I would die, actually, I would slap her across the face and tell her to snap out of it. WHO does that? And seriously, at $5,000 a day, bitch can afford someone to clean that shizz up. [pagesix]