I am pregnant Ya'll!!!!!!!!! And I'm keepin' my baby.

Talk about a trainwreck of a family...Jamie Lynn Spears is preggers ya'll!!! At 16, she is pregnant with her "longtime" boyfriend Casey Aldridge. What the hell? Longtime boyfriend? What is "longtime" for a teenager? I know an LTR in gay is like 6 months, and I know people that consider 3 months a long stretch. What is going on? She is 16. So many questions...and yet I am trying to feel sorry for her, but I am bent over in pain from the cruel internal laughter. This reminds me of the time half of my graduating class all got pregnant one weekend. And OMG, Britney is gonna be PISSED, because we all know how much that one loves her spotlight. She is gonna have a rage blackout and punch Jamie Lynn in the belly...or maybe throw her down some stairs. I mean just when you think the Spears family can't get anymore jacked and screwed up...Jamie Lyn runs out and gets a baby in her belly.

Jamie Lynn told mother Spears right before Thanksgiving. Talk about ruining the hell out of Thanksgiving. The 12 week pregnant Spears said: "As soon as I found out for sure from the doctor, I took two weeks to myself where I didn't tell anybody," she says. "Only one of my friends knew because I needed to work out what I would do for myself before I let anyone's opinion affect my decision. Then I told my parents and my friends. I was scared, but I had to do what was right for me."

She also said that Mama Spears was none too thrilled with it, but later became supportive. Um...yeah...that woman is an inept retard if she didn't see this one coming, because I think we all did. She also said: "She's never late for her curfew. I was in shock. I mean, this is my 16-year-old baby." What the hell does not being late for her curfew have to do with being pregnant, because clearly, she was considerate and respectful enough to her mother to finish getting plowed by her longtime boyfriend in time to be home by 10:30, but not considerate enough to avoid getting knocked up...and WHERE is the birth control? I mean, clearly kids that mind their manners still do the nasty and make babies.

Jamie Lynn plans to raise the baby in her home state of Louisiana — "so it can have a normal family life." Yes, because Louisiana is more normal than Los Angeles. She is totally going to be working as a change maiden at the local laundromat by the time she is 22. Let's not forget Dana Plato...may she rest in peace. This has all the makings of a Lifetime made for TV movie starring Melissa Gilbert as Mama Spears and Jamie Lynn Spears as Jamie Lynn Spears. I AM so gonna watch that! [MSN]