Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Cable News Anchors are HOT!

I would watch my local news more often if the anchors looked like these guys:

Thomas Roberts of CNN

CNN's AJ Hammer

(Not so cable) ABC's David Muir

Instead, when I turn on my news, I get this:

Dr. Marvin Monroe's long lost illegitimate latin brother Frrrrrrrrred Cantu. Yes he rolls the "R's" in Fred, eventhough Fred is not a hispanic name.


Joe Bickett, who is a complete jackass and believes that because Fox 7 is the only station in Austin that has a "morning show" from 5-9 that he is somebody. If you ever watch it, it more resembles cable access than anything. I feel bad for his female co-anchor...she must have murdered someone in a former life to have to endure his attitude.


You might think this one is a drag queen, but no. She is a morning anchor and seems to have more trouble reading the teleprompter than a 1st grade dropout from the 3rd ward in Houston. I have nothing against Melissa here, she just annoys me...especially in the morning when the last thing I need is to be annoyed.

Now, don't get me wrong, NOT ALL of Austin's anchors are complete fugs, but most of them are not people I would give a second look at even if I were blind drunk. It seems the cute ones are hidden in the basement, while the fugs take the stage. Those that I think are attractive are Josh Pells, Kelly Slifka......., and I think that is all.

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